The conditioned man

The term ‘conditioned person’ may require some explanation, but is now increasingly used. People who are programmed from early childhood in such a way that there is little or no room to live ‘broadly’ (in spirit) can suffocate and that leads to frustration. Frustration which can lead to disrupted interpersonal private and/or work relationships and sometimes people do not even notice and go along with the issues of the day or life.

Upbringing

It starts with raising children. In addition to regularity and discipline, children also need freedom to develop. Finding out how things go, how people react to each other, what interests you (and therefore trying it out), etc. It is obvious that this needs to be monitored by the educator, because children often do not know how far they can go. Letting them cross a line every now and then, possibly causing them to bump their noses, is also part of the same educational process. But the essence of living life and doing the things you are good at, what interests you and, above all, what your passion lies, makes life full and people happy.

Freedom within margins

To achieve this, sufficient freedom must be given. Freedom with margins within which children can take steps and therefore sometimes fall. But that is precisely the problem for many people.

It is often not an unwillingness on the part of parents/carers, but most people act within what they know, what they were raised with and what they feel safe with. With the best intentions to protect the child, that same child can be severely limited. The restrictions imposed by educators mean that the child also grows up conditioned and matures in that pattern. The question, however, is whether that is serious, unfortunate or okay?

Growing up conditioned

Everyone must decide for themselves what qualifications he/she attaches to growing up conditioned. What has now been shown is that (young) adults who have grown up conditioned have a greater chance of having problems choosing a job that really suits them and answering life’s questions later in life, better known as the midlife phase.

After all, we have to make choices about study at an early age. At times when the largest group of young people do not yet know what they want. One of the reasons is that barely 28% of young people work in the chosen field of study. Apart from the fact that it would not hurt to make study choices later, education also plays a role.

How can it be?

In addition to the aforementioned regularity and discipline, it is also important to introduce a child to what comes his/her way, what may come his/her way and/or to stimulate the process. Some examples:

  • Art ranging from music, theater, painting etc., in short, free expression.
  • Acceptance of yourself and the environment, everyone is different and that’s fine.
  • Not everything that is different is crazy. Or it may be crazy, but there’s nothing wrong with that.
  • Getting to know nature and respecting it (including the why).
  • Expressing your opinion is fine. However, don’t judge and certainly don’t condemn.
  • Being happy is important and that is different for everyone. But make sure that being happy is not only expressed, but that it also feels like it (i.e., get close to your feelings).
  • Money is a medium of exchange, not an end in itself.

These types of processes can be new at different ages and so guidance is important. This may be self-evident for educators who have been raised in this way, but it becomes more difficult if you, as an educator, have been raised in a reasonably to strictly conditioned way. However, if you really want the children to experience the entire spectrum, this is also possible. If necessary, go through the process together or seek professional support.

Pros and cons

Disadvantages lie mainly in the unknown, which sometimes requires courage or extra encouragement, but it can also be an advantage if the child then dares to push boundaries and can thus significantly expand its own spectrum. Another advantage is that the chance that the child will dare to follow his/her path in life is greater. This will also help you reach your goal sooner, entrepreneurship where your passion lies. All this makes a person more tolerant, judgment-free and happy.
A disadvantage such as bumping your nose during such a voyage of discovery actually does not outweigh this. But it is up to the parents/educators to let the child take that step. And very occasionally a child is so strong in spirit that he/she goes this route himself, which is a hand full for many parents and it is also absolutely important to guide this.

Finally

We all want to be happy and there is a significant group who are happy within the conditioned life. On the one hand because he/she does not know any better and on the other hand because this suits him/her. But what if, as a parent/educator, you have (and see) the opportunity to play a positive role in this process, which you wish for every child. It is also true that adults can still enter into this process, usually with guidance.